Test 2

Test

Hello? Mom?

Seriously. This is what sits behind that anonymous MySpace and Facebook message or friend request that comes up for all you ladies out there. Looks like a winner to me. Want his email, pager, cell phone, land line, fax, Skype, AIM, Yahoo, MSN, ICQ and IRC handle to chat with him? You know you do, don't lie.

Drown Monkey, Drown

People generally make me angry with their antics. They are like monkeys in a pool when it comes to their decision making process. You want to just dunk their heads back into the water and hope that nature intervenes and removes them from the gene-pool. You hope their lifeless monkey-body floats to the top only to be picked apart by seagulls, small fish and the sun. Unfortunately this does not happen and what we are left with is this confused monkey in a pool waiting for you to toss it a beach ball or some similar round object so they can frolic and be merry. We need to learn to dunk their heads. This is the only effective way we can mitigate such dangers as beach balls, pool parties and other acts of chaos brought to us by them. Hope is not lost, eventually we, the intelligent ones, will surpass these fools and this will no longer be an issue. Until then, you are stuck with an office, a chair that squeaks and a monkey in a tie asking you why you are late again. Understand, he, like other monkeys, enjoys his water. Just dunk his head.

My new heroes

We need a hero

It's amazing in a society that we live in there hasn't been some total uprising or anarchy on a daily basis. Are we that complacent with our lives? It seems "our leaders" are all historic figures that are either too old or not even alive anymore. We need a hero. Quite frankly if you think the president is some golden boy example, you are fairly foolish. While I respect the president no matter who it is, I do not believe they are truly heroes. A hero is someone who just shows up, takes care of shit, and takes off. You can have your own enemies, but likely they are going to target the hero before you anytime soon. The problem with that ideal situation is that nobody is even remotely motivated to do anything -- anymore. We live in a nice world where we sit behind our monitors, check email and deliver messages to people on an inconsistent basis. It's good times!

Know thy Enemy

In the first post, I went over how to identify the enemy. If you are too stupid to figure out who doesn't like you, this post does not apply.

You'll need to know your enemy; in fact many enemies are previous friends. If you just discovered someone "doesn't like you" for one reason or another, this will be fun and conclude this series of enemies, unless of course, you want to learn more about how to deal with them, just leave some comments.

Knowing the enemy is either. A person who identifies you as their enemy typically means they have contempt for you in one capacity or another and have no trouble making this known to you or by proxy. You should understand people who need to tell you they don't like you by proxy [friends, family, etc.] are just losers with a low self esteem who are too cowardly to confront you. If someone comes up to you in a parking lot, socks you in the gut and kicks you in the head a few times, you have bigger issues. I have found 9/10 that "enemies" just want to let everyone you know they don't like you. These folks would have no problem sitting next to you in a bar, taking a shot with you and talking shit behind your back when you take a pee in the bathroom in between drinks. You should regard these people as fools.

A problem with people who identify you as an enemy may be doing this as a preemptive move because they may have personally wronged you and want to parlay the blame. Keep mental notes on everything that was said, all parties involved, and make sure you have witnesses to such events. If you do not, it becomes a war of words between you and them. Remember: stay calm. The louder, more angry and screaming they get trying to get people to "believe them", just indicates to everyone else they are most likely not stable. Even if you did something wrong first, they won't be able to convey their message of hate about you effectively if they are making people have ear-bleeds with their ramblings. Let them go crazy first.

The worst part about enemies these days are how folks find a need to email, instant message and blog every known issue with their day from taking a shit, to grooming their cat, to some guy who cut them off on the freeway. Don't be alarmed if you see your dirt with them on a website, chances are they have other articles and postings about other people. If you don't see them there, they probably removed them and this vicious cycle probably happen annually with this person. Fear not, if they do this habitually nobody listens anyhow. I can almost guarantee they have a lot of one-liner pat on the backs within their comments section. If it's empty, this means people already gave up on them.

A good response to when they send a social communications message through a friend or such is to respond with "oh, now they have a new enemy, eh?"; and the reason you'd say this is to give the impression they've made a habit of claiming enemies everywhere. It discredits their claim partially. You can also say "I'm the new flavor of the week?", which basically says the same thing. Think of something sarcastic to respond with that down-plays their drama. Once you mutually agree to be enemies, it becomes a pissing war. If they continuously make claim you are their enemy and you do not acknowledge them, they'll eventually just go away, sooner rather than later.